#462 The top-3 episodes of 2024 [3/3]: Would you like to have more confidence?

Have you ever wondered how you can boost your confidence and achieve your goals? This episode is for you!

This is one of the top-3 episodes of 2024. We delve into the essence of confidence, a crucial trait that everyone desires but few understand how to cultivate. Whether you're looking to overcome fears, step out of your comfort zone, or simply trust yourself more, this episode provides actionable insights to help you on your journey.

1. Discover the four C's of confidence – commitment, courage, capability, and confidence – and learn how to apply them in your life.

2. Gain practical techniques such as stepping out of your comfort zone, visualization, and using body language to enhance your self-confidence.

3. Understand the importance of consistency and mindfulness in building and maintaining confidence.

Tune in to this episode now to start your journey towards unshakable confidence and live the life you’ve always imagined!

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𝗞𝗘𝗬 𝗣𝗢𝗜𝗡𝗧𝗦 𝗔𝗡𝗗 𝗧𝗜𝗠𝗘𝗦𝗧𝗔𝗠𝗣𝗦

02:02 - Part 1: Confidence is a learnable skill

11:54 - Part 2: Three simple techniques to increase your confidence

19:40 - Part 3: A comprehensive and motivational conclusion

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𝗩𝗔𝗟𝗨𝗔𝗕𝗟𝗘 𝗥𝗘𝗦𝗢𝗨𝗥𝗖𝗘𝗦

Get a free copy of my book "88 Actionable Insights For Life":

https://agikeramidas.com/88

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Transcript

Agi Keramidas: 0:00

Have you ever wondered how you can boost your confidence? This episode is for you. Welcome to personal development mastery, the podcast that helps intelligent, busy professionals develop self mastery and discover their calling so they can thrive in fulfilling, purposeful lives. I am your host, Agi Keramidas. Today's episode is the final of the top three episodes of the year that I've hand picked from the most insightful and popular episodes of personal development mastery podcast in 2024 so if you missed any of them the first time around, I would invite you to listen. Now, I believe that the themes explored in these particular episodes are the most valuable Today's episode was originally released as a special four week mini series. I have re edited and collated the episodes so that you can listen to the whole series in one short episode. It is a 30 minute master class in the essence of confidence, a crucial quality that everyone wants, but few know how to cultivate. So whether you're looking to overcome fears, step out of your comfort zone, or simply to trust yourself more, this episode provides actionable insights to help you on your journey before we get started. I have a quick favor to ask. If you find this podcast beneficial. Can you think of someone else you know who might find it useful and share it with them? Not only does this help the podcast grow, you also add value to people you care about. Thank you. And now let's get into the episode. Have you ever thought I'd like to have more confidence? If yes, then this episode is for you and it is for me as well, because I have many times thought the exact same thing. Welcome to Personal Development mastery Podcast, episode 397 and this is the first episode out of a special four week series on confidence. Today, I would like to share some of my thoughts on confidence. And really, if you think about it, confidence is one of the most important and desirable traits that someone can have, isn't it? And let me begin by saying when we say confidence, self, confidence is trusting in ourselves. As a matter of fact, the word confidence comes from a Latin word which means to have full trust or reliance. So when we are self confident, it means that we fully trust and rely on ourselves. And one thing we must understand about confidence is that it's not something that you either have or you haven't, or that some people have confidence and others not. Confidence really depends on what it is that we are discussing. For example, I'm confident to record this podcast right now, but if you ask me to recall myself showing off my dance moves, I would not be confident at all. So confidence completely depends. So today, I would like to help clarify a little bit what confidence is, and more importantly, how to improve it and practically. So I will share with you what confidence is in my point of view anyway, and also what is the only way anyone can improve their confidence. And then I will share three actionable insights that if they resonate with you, I invite you to use them. And let's begin with what confidence is. Confidence is a learnable skill. Confidence is a learnable skill. It can be cultivated, it can be practiced, it can be improved. It's not a matter of having it or not having it, and as a matter of fact, to acquire the confidence to do something, there is a certain process which Dan Sullivan of strategic quotes, calls the 4c Is of confidence. And this is how everyone everywhere grows, and the 4c are commitment, courage, capability, confidence. So initially it starts with the commitment, the commitment to face the uncertainty and take the action that might lead to discomfort. But once you make the commitment to take the action that takes you out of your comfort zone, you encounter fear. And the way to overcome this fear is by showing courage. Courage is taking action in spite of fear. And if you think about it, that's the only time when you need courage. It's when there is fear involved. Otherwise there is no need for a courage. So commitment creates the courage needed to step out of your comfort zone and to make the jump. Metaphorically speaking, I remember a few years ago when I had done a public speaking intensive training for five days, and when I returned from that, shortly afterwards, I was offered to deliver a public speech in front of an audience of 50 people at a networking event in the town I was living at that time. That took commitment, because I that was something that would take me out of my comfort zone very much, and it did, but I committed and agreed to deliver the speech, and then the courage came naturally as a result of this, because I had a date set to for the speech that for the event, and then I had some time for me to prepare and practice. So once I stepped on that stage, and that was my very first public speech in front of 50 people or so, once I stepped on that stage, I realized that the fear had gone, and that's when, in the terms of what we are discussing today, acquired the confidence of speaking in front of people. So bringing back to what I was saying about the forces, the commitment, courage, capability and confidence. Once we do have the courage to step out of our comfort zone, we acquire the capability. And when you have a new capability that creates confidence, now you are confident because you have done it. And I will ask you here to think about a time in your own life when you weren't confident at something however you had committed to do it and you had the courage to take action out of your comfort zone, and that led you to capabilities that allowed you to be confident at that so think about the time that you weren't confident at something and then you became and see how much of this process applies also to your experience of how confidence works. And I will close this by saying that once we have confidence, then it's like a cycle restarting, or better than a cycle, a spiral. We're going back to seemingly the the beginning, but it's not exactly the beginning, and that's why spirals is better than the cycle. So we go back and we recommit. We take our existing, new founded confidence, and we are putting more courage in and creating further capability and further confidence. So these were the 4C's of confidence, commitment, courage, capability, confidence. And to these 4c of Dan Sullivan, I would add two more C's of my own curiosity and consistency and curiosity. First, because in order to commit and do something, you will follow a calling of some sort, or an idea or something. That's how we commit. That's how I commit personally. So following that curiosity, that initial curiosity. It will allow you to start that process of confidence by committing to what you're going to do next. And I also had the sea of consistency, because it is an ongoing process confidence. It is. And I'm trying to explain this as clearly as I can, it is not a now I am confident and it is finished. It's not on and off. It is a process, a spiral of growing and evolving. So in that way, consistency is very important, because the moment you stop working your spiral of growth upwards, then the spiral goes downwards. And that's the natural tendency of things. Things will go downwards. They will be drawn by gravity down to earth. We have to maintain energy to remain above and go higher. So I hope this explanation gives you some insights on how does the process of confidence works, and you can reflect on your own experience and see how much relates and in what ways. And with this, I will conclude the first episode of a special four week series on confidence. Tune in next where I will share with you three simple techniques that are very useful in increasing your confidence. Welcome to Personal Development mastery podcast, and this is the second episode out of a special four week series on confidence. In the first episode of the series last week, we discovered the process of the 4c of confidence, the way that everyone grows, in a way that was, let's say, the theoretical background. So today, in episode two, we go to the practical today, we will take action. And today, I would like to share with you three simple techniques that are very useful in increasing one's confidence. And keep in mind here that I'm saying three simple techniques. The fact that they're simple doesn't mean that they are easy. So there is a subtle difference there. And the first technique I've already previously mentioned the phrase comfort zone a few times. So the first simple technique is get out of the comfort zone as much as you can. Whatever it is that you have some hesitancy inside you, that you a part of you wants to do it, but you are hesitant. You are afraid of doing it. There is something blocking you from doing it. That is because that action takes you out of the comfort zone. So go ahead and do it. Commit of doing it. That's when the courage will appear and move you forward to the capability and the confidence. One other practical way of increasing our confidence is utilizing the belief that we are confident. And to do that, we can use visualization. We can visualize what it is that we want to be confident in. What is the desired outcome of a situation, what does the confident version of us look like, feel like, behave like, speak like. So once we know these things, we visualize them, we imagine them, that this has happened, and that increases our confidence level, because the more we create that internal belief, the more into our potential we tap. And the third very practical way of increasing our self confidence is by using our physiology, the way we move our body, our. Stance, our body language. So you can, for example, take a power stance like, you know, stretch out your arms wide, look up in the sky or a ceiling, and actually do that right now, if you can stand up, stretch your arms out wide and look up in the sky or the ceiling, and at the same time, put a big green on your face. And do that right now, just for a few seconds, and notice how simply changing the physiology. Your physiology changes our confidence, because it changes our state, our emotional state. We feel stronger when we do that. So keep that in mind always when, especially when you catch yourself feeling not confident. Look at the posture of your body at that time, and you will almost always see that, especially when you catch yourself feeling not confident, you will see that your body posture, your body language, is of a certain way, notice it, and then once you notice it, change it, and that will shift the state, the energy and the confidence as a result. And I will give an example also for this particular technique. Let's say, for example, you have to go into a room full of people that you don't know, like a networking event. So think about how will a confident person act? So first, think about that beforehand. Visualize it, and when you actually walk into that room. Remember that other people don't know whether you're confident or not. They can't read your mind. They can't see listen to your thoughts, but what they can see is how you carry yourself. And if you walk into a room with your head pointing downwards and your shoulders forward, then that does show lack of confidence. Whereas if you walk into the room and have that body language with open shoulders and head looking up, the way that you carry your body, that it on itself, gives confidence, and it exudes confidence as well other people see it, perceive it. So I hope you found this useful, and you discovered either some insight or a technique that you would like to start implementing yourself to increase your confidence. And again, I will invite you, now that you've listened so far this episode, to take the next step and pick something that you resonated with from what I have discussed, pick one thing and implement it, practice it, make it a habit in your life and see what difference it makes on your Confidence. So if you would like to discover more actionable wisdom like this, you can download a digital copy of my first book, 88 actionable insights for life for free as my present to you for being in this personal development journey and wanting to grow so you can get a free copy of my book on agiramidas.com/ 88 or follow the link in the episode description and as an Epilog of this episode about confidence, I will close with the wise words of Henry David Thoreau, Go confidently in the direction of your dreams, live the life you have imagined. And this is the last episode in a special four week series on confidence. And in this last part, my intention is to offer a comprehensive and motivational conclusion. And so today, first, I'm going to summarize. Is the key points that we discussed over the previous three weeks. Second, I will offer some more practical tips or additional strategies for building confidence. And third, I will call you to action, because that's how you increase your confidence. So once again, welcome to the concluding episode of our special series on confidence. And today we'll tie it all together and look ahead on how you can continue growing your confidence. And let's begin by briefly summarizing the main takeaways from the previous three episodes. In Episode One, we discussed the theoretical foundation of confidence. We talked about the 4c of confidence, which is how we become confident, starting with commitment, and then have the courage to take action out of the comfort zone, and that leads to the capability, which, in turn, translates into confidence, because we have done it in episode two of the series, we discussed three practical techniques to increase your confidence, and I will go quickly through each of them again. I hope you have started practicing one of them, at least. But if you haven't, this is a great reminder that change only happens when you do, not when you learn. So the first practical exercise to increase your confidence is stepping out of the comfort zone. Go out of your way to get out of your comfort zone. Do one thing every day that scares you, step out of the comfort zone. Get into the habit of rising to meet challenges rather than shine away from them. The second practical technique we discussed was visualization, visualizing the desired outcome. So let's say, I will give a simple example. Let's say that you have a job interview. Before you go to the interview, you visualize yourself. You have the conversation mentally in your mind, and this builds your confidence because it empowers you with a vision of yourself being assertive, being relaxed. In this case, visualizing it helps you see results in advance. And the third practical technique to increase your confidence that we talked about was using our body to our advantage. And there is research that suggests that if you strike a strong pose like take up more space with your body, then your testosterone levels increase whilst your cortisol, the stress hormone levels, decrease. So if you adopt a bigger posture two minutes before a speech or a meeting, that will actually give you more confidence and help you perform better and concluding the summarizing takeaways from the previous three episodes. On the third part last week, we heard insights from four of my guests and their approach, their unique perspective on understanding and building confidence. So this was a recap of the key points that we discussed in the previous three episodes. And I hope you find it useful, because, as you know, repetition is the mother of skill. What is the most important here to emphasize again is that confidence is a journey, and also that confidence can be developed. The other core message that I would like to reinforce is the importance of consistent practice and self reflection in building confidence and talking about self reflection, I would encourage you to reflect on your own confidence journey and how you have grown or what you have learned in your own confidence journey, and even better than reflect on it, I would invite you to journal, write it down, or discuss these reflections with a friend or a mentor. So that's one thing that I will invite you to do. In addition to that, I will also offer you a couple of quick, effective, additional strategies. This for building confidence. And the first one is very simple, and it is to be aware of your shoulders. Drop your shoulders. Become aware right now, become aware of your shoulders and drop them. You will automatically feel less tense and more relaxed, and that creates confidence. So get into the habit of dropping your shoulders regularly throughout the day. Another technique, very important, one, is mindfulness, and that is a full topic on its own, but just one practical way that we can use it is one of the things that mindfulness teaches us, that thoughts are not facts, they are assumptions, they are opinions. So when we are faced with the thought, I'm afraid this is too difficult. I'm out of my depth. I can't do this. Realize that these are opinions and change it. Counter it with I'm not afraid. I can face this. I can manage this. In other words, change your internal dialog when you realize that you are becoming stressed, and if you drop your shoulders just a moment before that, it will make it even easier to access that state. And I will conclude this part of the final episode of the series by reminding once more it's so important that I need to say it a few more times, that confidence is not a destination, it is a continuous journey. So keep setting new goals, stay curious, commit to the actions that will take you out of your comfort zone, and then take the courage to take these actions and what your capabilities grow and your confidence grow. Remember that every small step counts, and as get the German philosopher said, as soon as you trust yourself, you will know how to live and self trust is in many ways, this confidence. So be confident. Remember, confidence is not about being fearless. It is about taking action despite the fear. So keep pushing your boundaries, keep believing in your potential and live the life you have imagined. As Thoreau said, Thank you for joining me in this series. Stay tuned for more series like that in the future, where we will continue to explore personal development, mastery and other specific topics. If you found this valuable, can you please share it with one person that you think will benefit from it? This was the third and final out of the top three episodes of the year that I've hand picked from the most insightful and popular episodes of personal development mastery podcast in 2024 I hope you found it enlightening. If you want to continue the journey further, join us in our free community, mastery seekers tribe. It is a space to move from inspiration to implementation, from knowledge to action. If you're not already a member, you are invited go to mastery, seekers tribe.com, and until next time stand out. Don't fit in you.